You might be from Seattle, if:

• You have no concept of humidity without precipitation.
• You throw an aluminum can in the trash and feel guilty.
• You use the word "sun breaks", and know what it means.
• You can’t wait for a day with "Showers and sun breaks".
• You only turn on your windshield wipers to "intermittent".
• You know more than 10 ways to order a cup of coffee.
• You complain about Californians as you sell your house to one for twice its value.
• You never go camping without waterproof matches and a poncho.
• You know the exact location of 15 drive-through espresso stands in your neighborhood.
• You stand on a deserted street corner in the rain, waiting for the "Walk" signal.
• You know more people who own a boat than an air conditioner.
• You obey all traffic laws, except "Keep right, except to pass".
• You let other drivers merge in front of you.
• You can taste the difference between Starbucks, Seattle's Best Coffee, and Veneto's.
• You consider swimming an indoor sport .
• You think that if it has no snow on it, or has not erupted recently, it's not a real mountain.
• You can tell the difference between Japanese, Chinese, Korean, Vietnamese, and Thai food.
• You understand what people mean when they say "pop".
• You consider a floating bridge a pain in the butt, not an engineering marvel.
• You know what lutefisk is (visualize Ballard, ufdah).
• You feel overdressed wearing a suit to a really fancy restaurant.
• You can point to at least two volcanoes, even if you can't see through the cloud cover.
• You personally know someone from Alaska.
• You think people who use umbrellas are either wimps or tourists.
• You find a wallet with $500 and give it back to the owner.
• You know how to pronounce Sequim, Puyallup, Rainier, Issaquah, and Puget Sound.
• You used to live somewhere else, but won't admit it publicly.
• You know the difference between Chinook, Coho, and Sockeye salmon.
• You knew immediately that the view out Frazier's window was fake.
• You are amazed at an accurate weather forecast.
• You switch to your sandals when it gets above 60°, but keep your socks on.
• You have actually used your mountain bike on a mountain.
• You would be miffed if the store were out of your favorite brand of water.
• You have ever ordered a "half caff/decaf, nonfat mocha grande with raspberry whip" (or know what it is).
• You put on your shorts when the temperature gets above 50°, but still wear your hiking boots and parka.
• You feel you've grown up with Bill Gates and can't figure out why people can be so mean to him.
• You know the difference between "Today's Forecast: showers followed by rain", and "Tomorrow's Forecast: rain followed by showers".
• In the winter, you go to work in the dark, come home in the dark, and yet only put in an 8-hour day.
• The bride & groom registered at REI.
• If someone ran your car off the freeway, you might drown.
• Half your friends work at Microsoft and Boeing.
• Fifteen blocks away is a good parking spot.

©1996-2016 F. Dörenberg, unless stated otherwise. All rights reserved worldwide. No part of this publication may be used without permission from the author.